I'm also at an age where there are many reasons why I haven't found a significant other yet. Typically, if I were to share this story online, people might speculate that it's because I'm unattractive, socially awkward, not serious about my studies, or a thousand other negative thoughts 🤢.
But I have this destructive thought, unsure if I should call it destructive or just self-aware 😞. In general, it's very self-conscious.
I was born into a normal family, did well in school, and my career is on track. Everything is normal, my mindset is somewhat outdated. Being the oldest, I take care of everything at home, looking after my siblings, taking on household responsibilities, helping my parents. In short, I'm someone who overthinks everything, worries excessively, and feels older than my age

. Early exposure to the internet shaped the thoughts I have today.
The main issue here is that whenever someone shows interest in me (directly or through friends), I become extremely afraid and insecure about them. Despite my personal achievements and where I am today, I often feel inferior to them, even though I may be doing just as well or better

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But their background is much better than mine, and I'm extremely self-conscious, afraid, like a psychological complex. I don't understand why. So, I try to create a barrier around myself so they can't approach me, even if I like them

I don't understand what's wrong with me. I always feel like they're on a different level and I can never reach them. It's a very frustrating feeling, like being stuck.